Saturday, May 27, 2006

A Brief Introduction...

“Life resembles a novel more often than novels resemble life.”
-George Sand

So I'm a flight attendant. Yup, it's a pretty sweet deal. Snappy uniform, exotic places, seeing the world and all that. It's very, very exciting. Do you know how many people stay up at night just wishing they could be flight attendants?? Hundreds, maybe even thousands. But not just anyone can be a flight attendant. It's not like you can just walk into the flight attendant place and say, "I'd like to be a flight attendant." No, there are strict guidelines, requirements even. I had to go through twenty, even twenty-one days of training. That's three weeks!! Just a few days ago I was in Lincoln Nebraska. When's the last time you went to Lincoln Nebraska? I bet it wasn't two days ago. No it wasn't, was it? And then the very next day, do you know where I was? Casper Wyoming. Only one of the biggest cities in Wyoming. Where were you? Probably home, in the same place you were the day before, left only to wish that you could be in Casper Wyoming. Think about that. I'M LIVING YOUR DREAM!

But I’m not just a flight attendant. Oh no, there’s so much more! I’ve got two degrees, one in Government and one in Philosophy. You can get really good jobs with degrees like that, which is how I landed the sweet flight attendant gig. Both of my degrees are from Oral Roberts University, one of the most conservative Christian universities in the country. During my time there, I uncovered many a funny story, situation, and anecdote. Fortunately for you, I’m willing to share from this treasure chest of humor.

Feel free to bask in the glory that has been my life so far. It’s painful, humorous, and sad.


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